Saturday, December 20, 2008

What will they think of next?

Grandparents are always to be feared when they start with the phrase, "Want to see my grandkids?" That could mean you might sit through 2 hours of home movies, or sort through a box of interminable fuzzy focused shots of little Johnny eating spaghetti, or dancing naked in the bathtub! Or it could mean she drags out "Grandma's Brag Book" at least 2 inches thick, capable of holding at least 300 photos.

Now we are in the digital age. Yes, you can print out your digital pictures, but more and more people just skip that step and leave them in the camera or on their computers. Maybe you can provide a slide show for your colleagues at work when you are away from the desk. I learned a lot about my secretaries' families in the college office because they had slide shows of their families going on their computers!

But things needed to be more portable than carrying around a computer. Even laptops need a surface to sit on while you are getting ready to show your family pride. You don't want your potential audience to have a chance to escape! So, digital picture frames were invented. That was my Christmas gift 2 years ago. It worked great for 2 months, till little boy M dropped it and broke it.

I went to a techie's house for a party last spring, and in every room was a digital picture frame, with a different set of pictures on each one! Cool idea, and as well, he had another slide show going on his wall-to-wall projection screen TV! The guests got a full evening of walking down memory lane with them. Not that I minded, because I had heard about all of their kids and all of their friends for years, but had never met any of them until that night. So I got a full dose of the family tree from the technology spread all through the house.

Well, even something as portable as a digital picture frame has its limitations in where pictures can be displayed. You can't take it on the bus, or train, it doesn't run on batteries, so this year, they've come up with the "gift of the year" a digital picture keychain! I could really zoom up on people and trap them into looking at my pics with one of those! But I found the utmost in portability and convenience, a digital photowatch! Right there on my wrist, yes, now my friends and family will be bored with 4 full minutes of slide show featuring my family members. NO ONE CAN ESCAPE! All while looking at my age spots and arm hair! How charming!

I think I've included everyone in my slide show who is in the family (except the animals, only Psycho Cat made the cut.) I even cut out the former girlfriend of SkaterBoy to get a shot of him all dressed up for prom, and had to include two shots of MonkeyGirl's wedding to get everyone in the slide (right side and left side.) In fact, MonkeyGirl, your wedding pictures are the only pictures I have of you! Get out from behind that Nikon camera and put yourself in front once in a while.

Watch out friends and family, this techie loving Grandma is ready to bore you, just give me 4 minutes of your precious time! Don't dare ask me for the time, or you will be trapped!

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